Overcoming Self Doubt and THREE DAYS IN JUNE by Anne Tyler
- Marisa Gelfand
- Mar 17
- 2 min read
Gail is in a whirlwind of self-doubt as she navigates her daughter’s wedding weekend. It’s hard enough watching her daughter marry someone she feels ambivalent about, but it’s even more complicated when she’s just been fired, wasn’t consulted about the wedding, and feels like she has nothing to contribute. On top of that, Gail worries about her appearance, fears she lacks people skills, and is uncertain about her role in the celebration.
To make matters worse, her ex-husband unexpectedly shows up at her doorstep, and she learns that her daughter’s fiancé cheated on her, prompting Gail to question how suitable the match truly is and raising concerns related to her own marriage. The self-doubt is overwhelming.
Self-doubt occurs when individuals perceive their thoughts, feelings, abilities, preferences, or priorities as flawed, unstable, or inadequate. This underlying belief in our incompetence often triggers avoidance, indecision, and isolation, creating a breeding ground for depression. Overcoming self-doubt demands a deliberate effort to understand oneself more deeply and to cultivate a positive, empowering view of who we are.
Here are tools for overcoming self-doubt.
Practice Affirmations: Make it a habit to repeat affirmations to yourself throughout the day. Be specific and optimistic. Remind yourself of statements like, “I am capable of achieving [specific goal],” “I am proud of how I [specific action or behavior],” or “I feel empowered when I [specific action or behavior].”
Be Your Own Cheerleader: We’re often quick to criticize ourselves, but it’s important to shift that mindset. Celebrate your achievements, both big and small. Acknowledge your strengths and give yourself credit for the positive moments you create.
Internalize Your Sense of Self: Take external opinions with a grain of salt—no one knows you like you do. Remember, how others treat you says nothing about your worth, your value, or what you truly deserve.
Set Yourself Up for Success: Set realistic, self-driven goals that are entirely within your control. When you achieve them, reflect on the strategies that led to your success, and celebrate your progress.
